Thursday November 14, 1991
We are up and out for a 20-minute walk. My first in months. My hips hurt and later it turns into a backache. It will take awhile to get back into better shape. My weight gain doesn't help. Lugging 42 extra pounds around is hard on my body, my knees, hips, and feet.
Dr. Bix said I would gain weight on the kemo but I think she's wrong. I don't feel any more hungry than on the last kemo. In fact, I think I'm less hungry and each day I plan to start eating right and each day my good intentions go down the drain. Do I think I should enjoy eating whatever I want cause my days are numbered? Maybe.
This post speaks to my heart! I don't know if it's because my mom was always dieting when I was growing up, or a genetic predisposition, but I too start each day with good intentions, but by the evening they are down the drain. I continually snack after dinner, even if I have eaten healthy all day long, thereby undoing all my good behavior. I am carrying around 75 extra pounds. I have pain in my back, hips, feet (plantar faciitis) and lately even my knees.
Her last statement makes me sad. She knows that eating healthy increases her chance of beating the cancer, but she is wondering if it is all in vain anyway because she is dying.
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