Off The Pump

Wednesday February 24, 1993

Slept pretty well in spite of having a lot of pain in my shoulder and in my abdomen and left thigh. I turned off the pump for an hour and it seemed to help. I'm up at 7 to get ready to go to the doctor. I get a terrible stomach ache from my cereal. I don't feel well at all.

Dr. Semrad thinks I need 4 weeks vacation from the pump. I couldn't agree more. He disconnects me. It's great to leave the pump there. We stop for a taco. It's 12:30. We go to Woodland Hills to make a CT appointment for March 10. At home I relax and sleep off and on all day. My shoulder hurts a lot.

My stepmother died of cancer a few years ago. Her first symptom was shoulder pain. When I mentioned this to a nurse acquaintance, she said shoulder pain is often the first sign of cancer. How awful for Mom to be in such pain and to live in pain pills which upset her stomach. So glad she got to go off the "poison pump."

For those of you who follow my blog, I know it has been quite a while since my blog was published. Part of this is lack of time, but also it is emotionally painful for me to see Mom suffer, something she hid well from me when she was going through it. My mother-in-law was diagnosed with ovarian cancer a few months ago and has been through 4 months of chemotherapy. Her surgery is scheduled for May 20 to take a look to see if the cancer is gone, but from the imaging that has been done so far it appears that the chemo is working very well. Apparently, treatment using "genetic targeting" is becoming more common. The genetic makeup of the tumors is mapped and the chemo is customized to attack those particular cells. Carmen is 81 years old but in very good health. She was a nurse for many years and she knew it was important to pay attention to her symptoms. When she noticed some abdominal pain she called her doctor right away and they took good care of her with diagnostic tests and early treatment. Her cancer was caught early.

Derek's Christening Day

Friday November 27, 1992 "Derek's Christening Day"

Up early and ready before 10 a.m. to leave at 10:40 for the church. Donna, Bob and Leah are there when we arrive at 10:50. Ric's mom, Carmen, is there with some family. Derek looks so cute in his white suit and hat.

The priest gives them quite a lecture about being Catholic. Ric says he believes in Christ, though he told us he is atheist. Chris agrees to bring Derek up Catholic though she is Protestant. I am very upset. This seems so wrong to me. I thought about it all night.

Back at the house Chris puts out a lovely lunch. Gary and Maria as Derek's new godparents pass out favors with money in it. Maria is taking this christening very seriously.

Later at 7 p.m. Gary and Maria go out to buy pizza and salad for all of us. We play cards with Donna & Bob. They sleep in their motorhome. I feel good.

What a big weekend, first hosting Thanksgiving dinner, and then hosting a big party for Derek's christening. The photo above is again taken on our front porch with the party guests. In the front row from the left are Carmen's granddaughters Crystal and Sabrina, Donna's (Mom's best friend from Pollock Pines) granddaughter Leah, Ric's friend Scott's two boys Nash and Mason (Scott is the photographer). In the middle row from the left are Carmen's grandson Daniel, Carmen, Justin holding our dog Jessie, and Joe, holding our dog Chewy. In the last row standing from the left are Carmen's brother Armando and his wife Ligia, Mom's best friend Donna and her husband Bob, Frank, Mom, Maria, Junior, my brother Gary, me holding Derek, and Ric.

The christening ceremony was held at Carmen's insistence. She was raised Catholic and believed that Derek would go to purgatory if he was not baptized, so even though I was not Catholic and Ric did not even believe in God, we agreed to the christening to make her happy. Mom was right, this was so wrong. The priest knew that I was not Catholic, but he addressed Ric during the ceremony and lectured him that he must raise his son in the Catholic church. We never went to that church again. I started attending a Protestant church when our second son Ryan was born 3 years later and Derek and Ryan both attended youth group and church camp (in fact Ryan just left for snow camp today), but I put my foot down with Carmen on having Ryan baptized in the Catholic church. It was fraudulent to go through that ceremony with Derek. I believe baptism represents being reborn through putting our faith in Christ and that the decision to be baptized is a personal one to be made by the person being baptized when they are old enough to understand that decision. I accepted Jesus as my savior when I was 15 and was baptized at Van Nuys Baptist Church. When my boys are ready to make that very personal decision someday, they will do the same.

Shopping for Maternity Clothes

Tuesday March 24, 1992

We believe Ric's mom is still in the condo so we eat our breakfast and shower in our trailer. Later we find out Ric's mom Carmen left at 6 a.m.

We go shopping at K-Mart and I buy Chris 2 maternity tops and one matching pants. That's her birthday gift as her birthday is April 9 while we're cruising.

I'm coughing today. Just a cough.

Frank and I drive Justin to his baseball practice in Windsor. He thinks we're great to stay and watch. We visit with John a bit. He's really glad to see us. He's retired now from Pacific Bell and planning to go into business for himself.

Frank and I buy food for dinner and fix it. A bit strange. Chris' friends stop by to meet us and check on Chris. They're nice.

As I said on yesterday's post, Carmen was and still is an early riser. She goes to bed early and is up and out the door to beat rush hour traffic through Marin County as she works at Kaiser in San Rafael.

That was nice of Mom and Frank to watch Justin's baseball practice. John, my ex, did indeed retire early from the phone company and had his own landscaping company for awhile. Now he sells trucks at a commercial dealership in Healdsburg.

Not sure why Mom and Frank prepared dinner or whether it was for all of us or not. What I do know is that at 5-1/2 months pregnant I was still suffering from severe nausea and just the sight of food would make me puke. I mostly got by on soda crackers and 7-Up during my pregnancy. I guess that's why I hadn't bothered to buy maternity clothes. I just didn't feel well enough to leave the house! Besides, I didn't need many clothes to lie in bed. I can't believe we actually shopped at K-Mart! How I detest that store! I cannot believe they are still in business with discount megastores like Walmart and Target attracting their customers.

The New House Under Construction

Monday March 23, 1992

It was very painful getting out of bed to visit the bathroom during the night, but I slept very well from 10:30 p.m. to 7 a.m. I awoke in much less pain. So much better I didn't even think to take any pain relievers (Tylenol) all day. We hung out in the trailer in front of Chris' condo til 9 a.m. then went in to clean up. We relaxed until 3 p.m. when we all went to pick up Justin from school.

Ric then drove us to see the new house in Windsor under construction. It's very nice and what a beautiful view of trees, meadows and streams from the rear of the house.

Chris is feeling much better, looks good, and is quite large at 5-1/2 months pregnant. We eat lasagna at home. Frank is a "great" grandpa spending quality time with Justin and fixing his bike, etc. Ric's mom comes for dinner and stays all night.

Ric and I lived in my condo in Santa Rosa for 3 months while we refinanced it to pull money out for a down payment on our new house being built in Windsor. Most of our furniture went into storage during the 3 months while we lived in our temporary lodging. The house on Wellington in Windsor is pictured above and is taken right about this time, a little less than 2 months before we moved in. The beautiful view of open fields and huge oak trees behind the house is what attracted us to the house, as well as being a little larger than the house we had previously lived in for a little over a year. This house was also on Wellington, 1/2 block down the street.

Ric's Mom Carmen worked and lived in San Rafael, about 50 miles south of Windsor. She was an early riser, so when she would come to visit, she would usually spend the night on the couch and then leave early the next morning before rush hour to make the drive to her job as a nurse's aid at Kaiser Hospital in San Rafael.

Day at Sea

Monday July 29, 1991

Frank is up and out for exercise classes. I had my breakfast in the cabin. Frank ate in the dining room with Anita and Bob. We had a lovely day enjoying the beautiful water, mountains and waterfalls. The water is very smooth, good enough to water ski. I'm taking the seasick pill anyway.

Our meals were lovely. We had fun horseracing and played bingo. The magic show was great but nothing new. We danced later and retired at 11 but set the clocks back to 10 p.m.

I'm fine except the usual aches and pains and the burn on my fingers from the iron this morning.

I'm wondering why mom had breakfast in the room. Could it be that the seasick pills were causing her to be drowsy? When we visited Alaska in 2001 we took the ferry from Prince Rupert, BC to Haines, Alaska. My mother-in-law Carmen was with us and she took a pill to prevent seasickness which knocked her out and she slept the entire day. The ferry, although quite large, is much much smaller than a huge cruise ship, so the motion is more noticeable. There was only one portion of the trip where we felt rollers and the captain announced it ahead of time to warn us. Most of the journey was in sheltered waters that were like glass. When we entered the open ocean after the captain's warning, we simply went on-deck in the breezy fresh air to prevent seasickness. I didn't want to sleep through the journey and miss the beautiful scenery.