Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Justin & Grandpa Bob

Friday July 3, 1992

Had a better night. Awake alot but not so much aching. Out of bed most of the day though did sleep in. Just really took it easy.

Gary will pick up Justin at the airport tomorrow at 4 p.m. He'll take them all to Castaic to see the fireworks. Then he'll keep him Sunday for a BBQ at Gary's with Bob & Geri. Bob and Justin have little to do with each other. I hear they just pretty much have nothing to say or do. But Bob's such a queer duck, he doesn't try or care or know how to reach Justin. Justin takes it as rejection; so does Bob. Too bad.

I don't think it was a rejection so much as just a huge generation gap. My dad was a child of the Great Depression. He was born in 1932. His parents reminded me of the couple in the famous American Gothic painting by Grant Wood, pictured below, very stoic, very unemotional and very conservative. They moved from Kansas to California to find work during the depression.

My dad shocked me years ago when he told me that during his entire childhood, he never once received a birthday present, a Christmas gift, or a party. That to me is borderline child abuse. Life must have been joyless without those things that most children enjoy. That sort of upbringing made my dad very conservative and emotionally unavailable. When my brother and I were growing up, we did have birthday parties and presents because my Mom made sure of it. My dad was the typical 50s father whose job was to just bring home the bacon. It was the wife's job to raise the kids and keep a nice home. When my Mom wanted to get a job outside the home when I was 12, my Dad's reaction was very negative. It was probably the beginning of the end of their marriage. He did not want an independent wife with a life of her own and views of her own. After their divorce, my Dad married Geri, pictured above, who was much more submissive and conservative. They were married for over 30 years until Geri passed away in 2010.

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